Before I dive into ideas about relational evangelism, I wanted to share a little more about the context of which we live ministry. These are some ideas from the Bills - Bill Easum and Bill Tenny-Brittain, co-leaders of 21st Century Strategies, Inc. These ideas come from their book Effective Staffing for Vital Churches, and offer another perspective (although related).
- "People don't come to church on their own anymore." Now they must be brought by a friend, relative, neighbor, or co-worker. Several of you who have commented on this blog have spoke to your efforts to do just that with your friends and co-workers. The Bills believe that this is one of the most profound changes for Christianity in our lifetime.
- "When people do show up at church they are blank slates we must write on." This statement reflects the "de-churching" of American culture. In the past, a majority of children in the United States either grew up in church, knew someone who did, or had at least some secondhand knowledge of what happens "at church." No more. According to the Bills, it now takes longer and requires more staff to disciple people than it did two decades ago. I also believe it takes more diligence from all of us.
- "When people think of Christians and church they are skeptical about our motives." No more are pastors revered even by people who attend worship. Now, before we disciple people, we have to gain their trust.
- "People are defecting from the church in record numbers." Today, paretns are more apt to leave the church when their kids leave home than they are to remain in the church. I've seen this happen at Community. The Bills explain that's why effective churches focus much of their attention on adults. That doesn't mean that younger kids and youth are ignored, it's all about building relationships with adults so that they stay after their childre are grown.
- "Global migration is changing demographics and culture." In the near future, if a church isn't multicultural, it probably won't be growing. We are blessed in this college town to have a diverse congregation, but we need to pay attention to how we can be more so.
The Bills state that the results of all of these changes is that "fewer people are attending worship today than every before in the history of Western civilization, and when they do attend they are mostly clueless about what it means to be Christian." Some recent Gallup polls report that although 79% of the US population consider themselves "Christian," these same polls also report that only 30% actually attend church regularly. The Bills believe that figure to be inflated, and that actually 17% of the US population attend church on any given weekend.
In the eyes of the world, the United States is seen as one of the largest mission fields in the world.
The Bills lift up that "the church must spend most of its time, energy, and money filtering people out into the community. The measurement of effectiveness shifts from 'How many in worship?' to 'How much difference is the church making in its efforts to transform the city.' The question 'What is God doing in our community that we can be a part of?' is replacing 'How can we get more people to come to church?'
The future is outward!
Next post will be some practical ideas on relational evangelism. Share your thoughts good people.
Seems like what we do has to be more about a relationship with God through His Son, Jesus, than about church. When we lift up the name of Jesus, "He will draw all men unto him!!" As we ask and invite and share our love relationship with Jesus, maybe we will see our church grow!
ReplyDeleteJust a thought!!
Thanks Karen. How would you ask and invite and share your love relationship with Jesus?
DeletePart of this, for me, goes back to the idea of building personal human relationships with people along with developing a God-focused relationship. Sincere invitation to see what is happening at CUMC and the positive impact CUMC can have on people's overall lives. By that I am thinking of how people, me included, compartmentalize most, if not everything, in our lives. It is how we cope with all of the inputs, influences and activities in our life. It can also, I think, be attributed to people allowing themselves to live by different rules depending on the people and/or environment around them at the moment. How many of us are guilty, or at least have first hand experience with others, of acting a certain way at church and another way at work, home or elsewhere. We are not sure who we are and can therefore can project a confusing picture to others. In this case, if we start talking spirituality with people they may wonder what we really believe, lending to the hypocritical stereotyping of Christians in some minds.
ReplyDeleteThis, I think, also contributes to the blank slate mentality of people coming to church for the first time. They may believe there is a "certain way" people are supposed to act in church and people may be afraid to be embarrassed by making a "mistake". A lot of this is alleviated with the instruction to get through the ritualistic stuff but people still spend a lot of energy trying to do the "right thing" rather than doing "their thing". Comments in my last post are also relevant here when people come to church and see all of the programs/groups/activities they may get immediately overwhelmed wondering how involved they need to get to be considered a "true" Christian. It's not wrong to offer a lot of activities, but people need to be made comfortable to act within their own comfort zone at first.
I think it is an interesting trend to see parents doing what we accuse young adults of doing, leaving the church when they get out of high school and away from the influence of their parents. So, apparently parents are also leaving church when they are not being influenced by their children, interesting. One area I believe CUMC is doing a better job is trying to reach out and build relationships with school age parents. We are trying to give parents a place for them and the kids. Not just a place to drop the kids off for a couple hours and come back later both Sunday morning and mid-week. I believe we also have some good groups/relational opportunities in place for people with graduating young adults. For those of us who's children are moving on we must realize we are role models to everyone around us and need to model church as being relevant beyond just raising kids.
Just some random responses...
Thanks Brian. A question for you... when we talk about sincere invitation... is it a sincere invitation to see what is happening at CUMC and the positive impact that CUMC has on other lives, is the sincere invitation to a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, or is it both? What are your thoughts on how what is happening at CUMC and it's positive impact on others is pointing to Jesus?
DeleteThe original response was skewed toward a sincere invitation to what is happening at CUMC specifically and building a relationship with people at Community. I believe in starting with the person and inviting them into a situation where they feel comfortable with the people and environment. They have fun and build relationships while growing in their knowledge and understanding of God, Jesus Christ and the church. At some point in this quest (yes I had to throw that in) a personal relationship with God and Jesus Christ develops, is nurtured and gets deeper. I believe the keyword here is personal which, to me, means the person has to discover/discern this relationship in their own way and in their own time.
ReplyDeleteGranted this approach is a very analytical and methodical but that is my nature. I, generally, do not approach things from an emotional direction. But I also recognize a more emotional to some can be more effective. That said, this is why a diverse approach is really necessary and why having a wide variety of groups and personalities is a strength for Community and not a liability.
Brian, thou art a very good Methodist! Thanks for your reply!
DeleteChrist is the answer to the human condition of misery. The church must show that is true for the real-world conditions people face daily. God bless.
ReplyDeleteThanks John. Where do you see our church doing a good job of lifting up Christ as the answer, and where can we be better?
DeleteI definitely believe that it is true that people who get plugged into a church come through personal invitation. I know that there are some people who come for the first time without any connection with someone there and then we don't see them again. Just in the last month, I've met an older lady name Marilyn who came twice but I haven't seen her since then (unless we have been going to different services) and I met a woman named Lisa with her daughter, Mallory. I only saw the two of them at their first visit. I kind of chuckled when I read Brian's comment about how people might feel overwhelmed with everything happening at the church. That seemed to be the impression with Lisa and Mallory who seemed quite wide eyed as they walked "the table" in the back of the sanctuary before worship. :) In fact, I think that they got so overwhelmed that they walked away before they made it to the first time visitor's gift! (I made sure that they got it after the service.)
ReplyDeleteI would also agree that trust is a big part of the personal invitation. If someone is not living out their Christian faith and gaining the trust of the person they are inviting, I think that it is unlikely that people will respond to the invitation.
The part that was surprising to me was the part about empty nesters leaving the church. Without a doubt, I think the trend remains that parents often come to church because they want their kids to learn about God. But it looks like we have a challenge on our hands to help adults see the value of church for themselves. :)